The emotional confusion we feel whilst navigating our grief can be overwhelming. We expect to feel empty, sad, hopeless and angry. Our situation is such that these emotions are only to be expected.
Yet what about the jealousy we feel when another of our friends announces a pregnancy?
Feeling jealous is confusing enough.
When you also add anger (why her not me) and shame (what sort of friend am I) into the mix the emotional confusion grows exponentially.
The emotional confusion grows when you recognise surges of jealous when you see a stranger’s pregnancy bump whilst waiting in the supermarket queue.
What sort of person am I that I feel jealous of a perfect stranger?
Gradually we realise that our grief is so deep that these feelings are also to be expected. We feel reassured that we are not monsters because other people in our tribe share their emotional confusion about these situations too.
There is safely, reassurance and healing knowing that we are not alone. Other people experience these unexpected rushes of emotion too. Knowing that normalises the situation and we take comfort from that.
As time passes, we get used to the roller coaster of negative emotions. We are no longer confused by them. The are accepted as an unwanted part of dealing with out grief. We get used to them and the predictably erratic nature of our emotions.
Then something happens
Our emotional confusion takes an about turn
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Be kind to yourself ….
In Canbace friendship
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